Five Ways I'm Trying To Start Again

By Marissa Burr

There are certain points in your life when you can definitively say that you’ve hit rock bottom, and so far 2022 has had a few. Right now, I’m currently trying to pull myself out of a hole ten feet deep. It’s not as easy as social media makes it seem, and I won’t pretend it is. Being a twenty year old doesn’t come with the finances or the discipline to redo your entire life– though I wish it did.

So after everything seemed to fall apart in October, I decided that I’d have to do a hard reset on my life since it was as frustrating as a broken computer. This meant discontinuing my college courses, resigning from my job, and giving myself a blank slate to work off of. Now if you decide you’re at the point I’m at, you don’t necessarily have to stop doing everything you’re currently doing. If school is going well for you and doesn’t cause more than the average amount of stress, you definitely can still revamp your life without stopping your coursework. I also don’t suggest quitting one job before finding another unless absolutely necessary. Starting this process involves a lot of self-evaluation and deciding what parts of your life you want to keep, and which ones need to go in order to help create a happier lifestyle.

Now that I’d cleared my schedule, I looked at the things I was doing that already brought me joy. Personally, this included cleaning, making social media posts, writing, organizing, and spending time with my friends. Then I was able to create a list that I feel is pretty universal so anyone can use it to start their new lifestyle

1. Write It Down

There are many different ways to go about this first step, but this is not one of the things on this list that you should skip. I started by filling out calendars with all of the important things I would need to remember. I’ve found that putting events in multiple places helps me stay on track better so I used my Google Calendar, a spiral notebook Planner, and a dry-erase board calendar. If you find that having everything in your phone works best for you, this step will be just as helpful if you only put the information in one place; it’s all about personal preference. Next up is to start making lists. There are many different kinds of checklists you can create, but in my opinion the top three that you should have are ones for supplies, tasks, and goals.

A supplies list can include groceries that you’ll need such as snacks to keep you productive and basic foods to ensure a stocked kitchen. Later in this list I’ll come back to the importance of eating at home as opposed to eating takeout. The supplies list should also consist of cleaning supplies and organizational tools you may need to help brighten your living and working space to increase productivity. As you go through the steps listed in the rest of this article, add in things you don’t have already. I know I’m always running out of tape, batteries, and command hooks when I am updating my apartment.

The task list is probably going to be a long one, but don’t let its size discourage you. Not every task needs to be done on the same day. Begin with the non-visual things you need to take care of such as filling out forms for a doctor's appointment or applying for a new job. Once you’ve done that, go room to room in your living space and write down everything you’d like to get done in there. It can be the smallest of jobs like wiping down the window; the more specific you are with your to-do list, the easier it will be to check off each line. If it helps, organize the list by making each room a separate list and tape it up to the door so it can be a visible reminder of both your progress and intentions.

The most important list you’ll need for this process is the one describing your goals. Start small–three to five–and as the ideas flow the list can expand. You’ll write down what you want to get out of this lifestyle change. For example, my goals list includes:

• No longer feeling distressed as soon as I wake up in the morning

• Easily being able to swallow everything I have on my plate at one time

• Be the best version of myself that I can be in order to put that positive energy out into the world around me

This is not a list that necessarily needs to have items checked off. It can be more of an abstract thought and a reminder of why you’re making these difficult changes to your life. It can also be updated as you go deeper into this process.

Remember, these don’t have to be aesthetic or even make sense to anyone other than yourself. Scribbled down notes on post-it-notes can be just as effective as a color coded list made on the computer.

2. Find Visual Inspiration

It’s easy to feel motivated to change your lifestyle in the first few days or even weeks of the plan. Sticking to it until you get the desired results is how you’ll see lasting results though. In order to do this, I try to find inspiring works that others have done to keep me going. I keep a Pinterest board going with images and articles I find that I can use to organize pieces that I find inspirational. I’m constantly updating it.

I also like to keep a few books around my apartment so that way I can read them whenever the process is losing its sparkle. I’m currently reading Good Vibes, Good Life by Vex King and The Gift of Presence by Caroline Welch, both of which I got from Target. I cannot stress the effect of reading a good book in a comfy chair with a warm beverage enough. That itself is sometimes enough for a mini life-reset. If you’re not a big reader, television shows and Youtube channels can also be helpful, depending on the type of things you’re into.

3. Do Your Laundry

Now this may seem a little out of place on this list, but I stand by it. I am one of those people that dread doing laundry because of the sheer amount there is to put away once it's all done. If you make a day of it though and buckle down to get it all done, it makes a huge difference. But don’t just rush through it, make it a pleasurable experience.

Throw on your favorite playlist or album and have it playing through your earbuds. Then, sort all of your dirty laundry–yes, all of it, even though this may require scouring every room of the house. I prefer washing clothes based on color (lights, colors, and darks) but washing by texture or type of clothing works just as well. Make sure you include towels and washcloths in this load as well. Now, throw the first batch in the washer with detergent, and if you have the means to purchase it then buy scent beads or fabric softener as well. It makes the freshly-washed smell last so much longer. When it’s time for the dryer, switch the clothes over and throw in a dryer sheet– though I prefer dryer balls because of their environment-friendly qualities. Keep this cycle going as you work through the mountains of dirty clothes, making sure that as a load finishes in the dryer you immediately fold and put it all away to avoid a pile up. This way, once the last load is complete, all of your laundry is done.

So, why laundry? Well, there are a few reasons. Most importantly, it immediately gets rid of what can be a huge source of stress in your life, whether it’s because of the mess it creates or the frustration of not being able to find a specific piece of clothing. Having all of your laundry put away also allows for ease when picking out an outfit for the day. Getting dressed every day, even if you are just staying in can help improve your overall attitude. Now you can pick out a stylish or functional look that complements the day you’re trying to have. Another benefit of doing all of this laundry reminds you of the clothing pieces that you may not wear or don’t like anymore. Take these pieces out of their spots in your drawer and put them in a box to be sold or donated at a facility near you.

Depending on how well you keep up with laundry right now, this can seem daunting. Trust me, I get it and I’ve been there. But try and focus on the future full of happiness rather than the few hours you will be uncomfortable. It’s worth it.

4. Redo Your Spaces

Living and working in a clean, organized, and positive atmosphere is key to being productive. After step one, you’ve already got a list ready with everything you’d like done to improve these spaces. The next part is actually completing those jobs. At the bare minimum, try tidying them so that everything has a place and the room is usable. Then, when you’re feeling up for it, deep clean it by sorting through things you don’t need anymore as well as dusting and scrubbing surfaces. Finally, add in any new touches to make the space more pleasing to you. These can be items you bought off of your supplies list. Picture frames and wall decor are always my go-to pieces that help my spaces feel brand new. Like I’ve said, this doesn’t have to all get done at once, but just know that once it is complete it can do wonders for your mood.

5. Put Yourself First

You cannot help anyone until you are in a good place yourself. It may seem selfish, especially to those of us who were raised to do everything for others and have our own needs be an afterthought. This is wrong, and if you’re truly committed to changing your life and bettering yourself, then you need to be at the forefront of your attention. Do this both physically and mentally.

Physically, the best way to do this is improving the way that you treat your body. Drink at least eight cups of water every day and continue drinking throughout every part of your day. This means if you exercise in the morning, don’t stop hydrating just because you hit eight cups of water before noon. Keep a water bottle with you all day and prioritize your intake. Also, try and reduce the amount of takeout you eat. Cooking at home allows you to control how much food you get and know everything that is going into your body. Make sure that you’re eating a balanced diet in order to have the utmost energy to go through your day. Don’t skip meals either. Eliminating eating out will also save a lot of money which can be used for other things such as gym memberships or new walking shoes. Exercise is also important to physical health, and can even extend to improving mental health. Even if you don’t have a lot of time, a ten minute walk around the block can energize you to take on the hardest of tasks.

Keeping up with your mental health can sometimes be a harder task to implement. I have struggled with multiple mental illnesses for years now, and while by no means does this make me an expert, I am always offering advice based on my own experiences with what has worked for me. Positive self-talk is key; your mental struggles are not your fault, so don’t be beating yourself up for them. Try waking up every day and telling yourself “I can do this” and “I am capable of great things.” That mindset can make a huge difference. On days when everything seems to be a struggle, try breaking each task down so it’s easier to swallow. Make every little piece–like eating breakfast or getting dressed–an accomplishment. You’ll see that you can do a lot more than you feel you can. If it’s for you, I always encourage talking with a mental health professional.

It may be difficult to start this journey of reinvention, but if you’re considering making these changes then odds are life is already kicking your butt. You have nothing to lose from doing things to better yourself, and I hope that if you embark on this journey you find what you’re looking for.